Enlightenment

I read a quote yesterday that was listed as being written by Siddhartha:

The greatest achievement is selflessness.
The greatest worth is self-mastery.
The greatest quality is seeking to serve others.
The greatest precept is continual awareness.
The greatest medicine is the emptiness of everything.
The greatest action is not conforming with the worlds ways.
The greatest magic is transmuting the passions.
The greatest generosity is non-attachment.
The greatest goodness is a peaceful mind.
The greatest patience is humility.
The greatest effort is not concerned with results.
The greatest meditation is a mind that lets go.
The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances.

There were some things that echoed some Biblical ideas to me, not quite, but almost there. The main difference I noticed is that the Bible is more of a user's manual - there are great messages about how to live your life and also practical ways of getting you there. I remembered a book that a friend of mine was reading in college by Herman Hesse titled "Siddhartha," and I looked up the name because I didn’t know who Siddhartha was. I found out that Siddhartha Gautama is also the name of the first Buddha whose teachings are the basis of Buddhism. I read about the book, and the character in the book is different from this first Buddha, but it is a story of a man’s journey to enlightenment. I also read that the word Siddhartha is from Sanskrit, and is made up of two words, Siddha which means achieved, and artha which means meaning or wealth. Together they mean “One who has found meaning (or existence)” or “One who has attained his goals.” It's interesting to me that the word artha can mean "wealth" or "meaning." It made me think of Christ's offer to give us an abundant life.

I know people from all different backgrounds and beliefs, and sometimes they try to tell me that my faith is just my own opinion, that the way I discuss the miraculous changes that have occurred in my life and the miraculous things that have happened and happen every day is just my way of explaining coincidences or things that would have happened naturally, for example, sometimes when I talk about how I live my life in every way differently now they'll tell me that it's just because I've grown up. Some people I know will tell me that all faiths are the same and that we just have different ways of expressing our faith. I’ve studied a bit about other faith traditions since I was born again, and I also studied a bit before. I wouldn’t claim to be an expert in any way, but the one thing that I have noticed is that there is no other faith that has a Savior and Redeemer who went to the Cross out of love.

When I was born again, the first feeling that I remember having was being filled with the knowledge of God’s love. It was so powerful that it opened up a river of tears inside of me that I had been holding back for years. And I didn’t just feel the love of God for myself, I understood the love of God for every person, no matter who they were or what they had done or what their beliefs or unbeliefs were. About a year later I had the opportunity to see the movie the Passion of the Christ. I spent most of the movie crying, weeping, because of the love of God that is present in His sacrifice on the Cross. I’d read my Bible by then, and many of us know the story of His trip to the Cross even if we haven’t read it, but the movie showed in graphic detail what He endured on that road to Calvary, and all I kept thinking about was that anyone else faced with that kind of torture, anyone else in that depth of pain, anyone else who did not love us as passionately as He did, would have stopped before they even started. The fact that Jesus was both fully human and fully God as He walked that road to the Cross means that He felt everything as intensely as a person would. And the fact that He was fully God means that He could have said at any time, that’s it, none of you are worth this, and stopped the whole thing. The fact that He kept walking, knowing each of us as He does, knowing who each one of us would be, knowing who would sin and how, knowing who would reject Him, knowing who would betray Him, the fact that He kept right on walking is a miracle of love. There is no greater love than that anywhere, and if we choose to take Jesus out of the picture of our faith, then we take away that amazing love of God.

I remember talking to someone I know and sharing my testimony about why I know that my Redeemer lives (Job 19:25). I have been redeemed, I have been changed and I have seen His miracles over and over again in my life. At some point or other this person said to me, “I want to see these miracles,” and I said you will, just open your heart to the possibility of the love of God that is in Jesus Christ. Later on, as things would happen that would be surprising blessings in this person's life, I’d say, “That’s answered prayer!” and this person would say something along the lines of, “Well it’s good luck anyway.” Why is it that we have such a hard time receiving the love of God? I know I did. I was also someone who always said that it was luck or the “the universe” or something else but God. For years I would look the miraculous in the face and say that it was an amazing coincidence. Why is it that we have such a hard time receiving the love of God?

I think for me there was something that was bound up in wanting to live my life without any rules. I wanted to do my own thing and make my own choices, and I was afraid that Christianity was something that would take away from my independence. People I knew were taking pieces of different faith traditions and putting them together to make a patchwork kind of life, and that worked for me. Take a little bit from here and a little bit from there, take the parts about being at peace and being nice to people, but only of course if they were nice to you. It was easy to walk a walk of cobblestone faith, jumping from one block to the next whenever it suited me. There are beautiful things in all faith traditions, and it was easy to pick those and ignore the ones that were not so beautiful, the ones that might put me on the spot a bit or ask for some accountability. But then I found myself in a place where making up my own rules and living by my own choices had left me with nothing to hold onto. It was a place of desolation and destruction, and the only one who cared enough to help me out of it was Jesus.

There’s a song that we sing in church, “Where would I be, you only know, I’m glad you see through eyes of love, a hopeless case, an empty space, if not for grace.” He knew before I was ever born that I would end up in that place, and He went to the Cross so that He could reach out to me across the abyss I had created in my own life. Why is it that we have such a hard time receiving the love of God?

Another place that was a stronghold for me was pride. I wanted to believe that everything that I did I’d done with my own strength and intelligence and skill. I think I even wanted to believe that the “luck” I’d had was somehow something that I deserved because of my being such a great person or something like that. Now that I know that the gifts and skills that have been given to me are blessings and that if I use them to help others instead of just helping myself I am blessed even more, now that I know that I don’t deserve the blessings I receive but that God just chooses to bless out of love, now that I know that I am loved just because He loves and He is love, what an amazing blessing knowing His love is! Why is it that we have such a hard time receiving the love of God?

On my way home last night I stopped off at CVS to buy some razors. They were having a sale, and they do this thing that you can get what they call “Extra Bucks,” a coupon of dollars good for using in the store for another purchase. I had some other coupons too, so the sale with the extra bucks and my coupons was a really good deal, plus I could get more extra bucks when I bought the product. Something happened at the checkout that the package I was buying didn’t ring up at the right price. But it was cheap enough anyway after all my coupons, so I didn’t make a big deal about it. But then the extra bucks didn’t print out, and the nice young man at the cash register called the manager over. She gave me the sale price and the extra bucks, but it was a bit confusing because the transaction had already been done and paid for so she had to pay me back for the difference in what I paid and the sale price and then print out the extra bucks, but we got everything done and I left.

I was in a mall and the exit was across the mall from the store and up and down some escalators. I got all the way to the exit and realized that there was something wrong with the amount of money I’d gotten back. They’d given me back too much, I wasn't exactly sure how much, but somewherre around a dollar. Before I was born again I would have just taken the money and thought, wow, that was an even better deal, but I can’t do that now – I don’t say that just because I’m supposed to – I really feel guilty when I do something like that because it’s stealing, no matter how much or how little it is. So I took a minute and figured out that they’d paid me 80 cents too much and went back up and down the escalators and back across the mall, gave the young man his money and left again. He was surprised and thankful, and I said, hey, if it was the other way I’d have been back here in a hot minute – it’s only right for me to come back if I owe you. I went back across the mall and up and down the escalators, and when I was going down the last escalator I realized that I really owed him another 20 cents. I took another minute to make sure that was right, and it was, I checked with the Lord to see if I had to go back and He said it would be nice, so I did. The poor guy was really confused at this point. I just told him I’d finally figured it out and that would be the last time he’d see me, wished him a great weekend and went on my way.

The whole way home I was so full of joy I kept laughing. The whole scenario was so ridiculous, and somehow it was also so very, very funny. The look on the guy’s face when I went back a second time was priceless – he must have thought I was completely nuts – and I guess I am by regular human terms, but if you really think about it so was Jesus to walk all that way to Calvary that day. The reason I know that my Redeemer lives is that I would have never bothered to go back to that store even once before I was born again. I would have thought that somehow I deserved to get that extra dollar, and would have felt very smug about getting it. But here I was laughing my head off, full of joy, because I’d done the right thing and been honest. I didn’t have the extra dollar, but I had so much more.

God’s math is funny that way. He’ll give you joy and peace and love in return for doing something that is right. When you give to others you receive even more back, when you’re fair you get a blessing in return. And the other side is true also. If we take from others, or harm others, if we take that extra dollar that is not rightfully ours, somewhere down the road we’ll have to pay it back, and much more. Galatians 6:7-10 tells us, “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people.” The passage actually ends with the words, “especially to those who belong to the family of believers,” but I like the idea of doing good to all people. That guy in the CVS could be a believer or not, but if I show him the love of Christ and the giddiness of the Holy Spirit, if he is a believer I could help strengthen his faith, and if he’s not, he might just see something that he’s never seen before, something that might seem like Good News.

Blessings,

Jannie Susan